Fix most overfull hboxes

This commit is contained in:
cruft 2009-07-10 15:02:15 -06:00
parent 3d3faa8f4c
commit 350197d19d
36 changed files with 92 additions and 120 deletions

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@ -1,4 +1,4 @@
\documentclass[draft]{book}
\documentclass[draft,10pt]{book}
\usepackage[papersize={397pt,614pt}]{geometry}
\usepackage[T1]{fontenc}
@ -11,6 +11,13 @@
\title{Horrors 2: Clever Title Here}
\author{The Something Awful Forums}
\hyphenation{
Ba-var-ious
Ba-var-ius
hid-eous
mos-qui-toes
}
% For specifying author
\newcommand{\by}[1]{
\vspace{-20pt}

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@ -53,7 +53,7 @@ beast.
Not deterred by this horrendous creature, Bavarious screamed at the
Not to be deterred by this horrendous creature, Bavarious screamed at the
top of his lungs, ``{\bf Evil-doer! Villain! You do not frighten
me!}'' As he screamed, flecks of spittle mixed with the
still-running blood from his broken nose, only attracting the giant

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@ -68,7 +68,7 @@ floor.
I screamed and began to run away from him. He waved his hand high
in the air and screamed after me.
``Bavarious, give me your gun and your badge, you drunken fool!'' He
``Bavarious, give me your gun and badge, you drunken fool!'' He
screamed.
``McClenaghaaaaaan!'' I screamed right back at him.

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@ -92,9 +92,9 @@ screamed out in dying death forever. The head doppelganger screamed
as all the blood and pus and bones exploded out of him like in a
Mortal Kombat fatality.
``Another day another time the earth was saved from
dopplegangers by Luke Bavarious'' said Luke Bavarious as he
walked away in slow motion. Behind him, the factory exploded.
``Another day, another time the earth is saved from dopplegangers by
Luke Bavarious,'' said Luke Bavarious, walking away in slow
motion. Behind him, the factory exploded.

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@ -5,7 +5,7 @@
The horrid, crushing sound of a gushing river broke through Luke
\noindent The horrid, crushing sound of a gushing river broke through Luke
Bavarius's rushing mind. He had awoken from a deep sleep to the
sound. The horrid sound. He had a hangover from too many Coors, and
it was driving him mad. Ever since the alley, where the ghoul had

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@ -15,7 +15,7 @@ Nothing.
With a sigh that poured from his mouth with a torrent of non-amused
frustration
Luke Bavarious pulled a small slip of paper from his pocket and
Luke Bavarious pulled a small slip of paper from his pock\-et and
wadded it up and tossed it into the waste receptacle with the
precision of a black man that shoots basketball in a Lakers jersey.
As a fan of black culture Bavarious was known for his hoop skills.

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@ -1,5 +1,5 @@
\chapter{The Horrid Assignment}
\by{Dr.~Mulholland}
\by{Dr.\ Mulholland}
@ -114,7 +114,7 @@ green cut grass.
Bavarious woke up. He had fallen asleep. He had dreamed of what
Bavarious woke up; he had fallen asleep. He had dreamed of what
happened in the mob bosses house 50 years ago. Then he realized. He
was the kid of his dreams. Bavarious let out a scream and turned
and ran and went out the front door. He tried to open the door on

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@ -26,7 +26,7 @@ in person? No? Could you put that down Bic pen already? You know
the clicking, and all. I get skittish, too. Honestly it's
alright.
You DO seem horribly tense. I am not, let me assure you, Mr. Ehl
You {\em do} seem horribly tense. I am not, let me assure you, Mr. Ehl
Bee. There is no need to go all star struck on me. I am as much of
a nobody as you are, probably more of a nobody.
@ -162,8 +162,8 @@ function back in those days.
Well it started out as a sort of joke, you know.
Don't-You-Drink-Too-Much-Sweetie-Or-You'll-Get-Us-Mixed
up. Shits and giggles and lots of fun at parties with my Dad and
``Don't you drink too much, sweetie, or you'll get us mixed
up''. Shits and giggles and lots of fun at parties with my Dad and
his brother showing up in identical suits and my mom pretending to
accidentally kiss the wrong clone et cetera.
@ -385,7 +385,7 @@ fucking profile.
I don't even fucking care. You think I haven't told
this story? Who {\em told} you this story? Was it Luke? Mr. Ehl
Bee, mr. Writing-under-a-Pseudonym-to-be-artsy-Biddick, with his
Bee, Mr.\ Writing-under-a-Pseudonym-to-be-artsy-Biddick, with his
prodigious talent and his intense, {\em fucking} eyebrows that he
probably picks like a bitch? Was it? It wasn't. It was me. I
want you to stand up, walk over to that bookshelf right there. Go

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@ -20,7 +20,7 @@ it.
Lurking about the corners. Hiding in the shadows. She thought it
was her imagination. She thought she had been going insane. They
said you showed the first signs of schizophrenia when you became a
said you showed the first signs of schi\-zo\-phre\-nia when you became a
teenager. But then, it must have slipped up, for she had seen it
squarely, with both eyes. What's more, it knew.
@ -48,7 +48,7 @@ find out.
How she had wished she had paid better attention! Though even if
How she wished she had paid better attention! Though even if
she had spotted the creature earlier she would not have known how
to defend herself against it. It had been following her for weeks
though. Weeks in which some shadowy thing had been watching her,

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@ -135,7 +135,7 @@ younger.
``Oh,'' he said, rising from his coffin. ``You mean
``Oh,'' he said, rising from his coffin, ``you mean
the traitor.''

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@ -52,7 +52,7 @@ begins to wear off. I grit my teeth to keep the cascade of bloody
lung chunks at bay. Looking up after containing myself I see a ring
of children.
The child I was following is being welcomed into the group. I
The child I am following is being welcomed into the group. I
notice at this stage the the children are just rotting husks in
varying states of decay. They begin moving in a kind of reverie
cadence. Mesmerised, I pull myself up from the stump that I had

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@ -31,9 +31,7 @@ what he could do.
He ran into Suzy, his sister, she teased him and called him a
pussy. {\em She called me a cat that's not insulting why would she
call me
a cat?} thought Luke.
call me a cat?} thought Luke.

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@ -1,4 +1,4 @@
\chapter{It's just me, 'Luke'}
\chapter{It's just me, `Luke'}
\by{Lorentz Factor}

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@ -215,7 +215,7 @@ precious grey matter and I squeezed.
The round screamed through my head and smashed through my
The round screamed through my head, smashing through my
skull.

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@ -77,40 +77,27 @@ dangerous missions. I howled into the night:
{\em ``Pump up the jam
Pump it up
\begin{quote}
Pump up the jam \\
Pump it up \\
A pump it up - yo pump it
Pump up the jam
Pump it up
Pump up the jam \\
Pump it up \\
A pump it up - yo pump it
I don't want
A place to stay
Get - your booty - on the floor tonight
I don't want \\
A place to stay \\
Get --- your booty --- on the floor tonight \\
Make my day
I don't want \\
A place to stay \\
Get --- your booty --- on the floor tonight \\
Make my ---
\end{quote}
I don't want
A place to stay
Get - your booty - on the floor tonight
Make my -}
A kid stepped out onto the path. His clothes were in tatters and he
@ -141,7 +128,7 @@ this unexpected ordeal and continued on my way.
At the Seaport, an eerie quiet abounded. One boat had some lights
on but it was offshore. I rappelled down the Brooklyn Bridge and
back-flipped onto the deck. I lay crouched for a few minutes, my
back-flipped onto the deck. I lay there crouched for a few minutes, my
duster billowing in the wind, eyes scanning the deck for
movement.

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@ -66,11 +66,11 @@ no lips, only teeth. I shook.
``Daddy, what are you doing?'' the shadow on the right enquired
meekly. Sasha?
``Daddy{\ldots}daddy's going away for a while,'' I whispered. The knife
``Daddy{\ldots} daddy's going away for a while,'' I whispered. The knife
was still in my hand, in front of my chest, frozen in place.
``Look{\ldots}daddy can't be with you guys for very long anymore. I won't
be alive for long{\ldots}I must go.''
``Look{\ldots} daddy can't be with you guys for very long anymore. I won't
be alive for long{\ldots} I must go.''
``But you can't go, Daddy.'' The silhouette on the left was still
smiling, the white of his teeth glowing eerily in the darkness. ``If
@ -78,11 +78,11 @@ you go{\ldots}I'll eat Sasha.'' The teeth spread to a grin.
``Johnny{\ldots}'' I gasped. As I looked on, Johnny's grin seemed to grow
wider and wider. The rows of teeth separated to form a hole between
``Johnny,'' I gasped. As I looked on, Johnny's grin seemed to
grow wider and wider. The rows of teeth separated to form a hole between
them, and the hole widened to a yawning chasm of unfathomable
darkness. A different voice emanated from the hole. ``Daddy,'' it
drawled. ``If you go{\ldots}I'll eat Sasha.''
drawled. ``If you go{\ldots} I'll eat Sasha.''
@ -92,7 +92,7 @@ as far apart as a basketball, face torn apart by a chasm.
My vision blurred and it became increasingly difficult to breathe.
The knife dropped from my hand. Between ragged breaths, I gasped
weakly. ``Johnny{\ldots}you have your mother's smile.''
weakly. ``Johnny{\ldots} you have your mother's smile.''

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@ -12,8 +12,8 @@ pet store at the end of the strip.
Suddenly a little boy sitting on a mall bench yelled out. ``Hey
mister! I don't think you should go in there,'' he hollered.
Suddenly a little boy sitting on a mall bench hollered out. ``Hey
mister! I don't think you should go in there,'' he yelled.

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@ -68,7 +68,7 @@ here{\ldots}
``Mr. Bravarious, I can barely hear you through the speaker.
``Mr. Bravarious, I can just barely hear you through the speaker.
Why don't you come down and talk to me through the bars?
I'd like to talk man to man anyway.''

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@ -16,7 +16,7 @@ murdered in the house. It was a horrid house.
The book had leathery bindings and a feint smell of some
body-emitted liquid he couldn't quite recall. He thought briefly of
body-emitted liquid that he couldn't quite recall. He thought briefly of
pus or urine but decided that wasn't quite it. He then remembered
that he was angry. He angrily threw open the cover and looked at
the writing. It was in Latin so entirely hieroglyphic, but he saw

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@ -1,4 +1,4 @@
\chapter{Reunion Under a Blood Red Moon}
\chapter[Reunion]{Reunion Under a Blood Red Moon}
\by{Sleepless Dreamer}
@ -106,17 +106,3 @@ disappear.''
Luke smiled and said to no one in particular: ``Psychiatrists,
what do they know?''
* * *
I actually like the alternate ending more than the original one,
however the alternate one is closer to what I usually write.
Hopefully I managed to make something bad and good at the same
time.

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@ -58,7 +58,7 @@ name anyhow mister?'' asked Luke.
\section*{Chapter 2}
The next morning, AC picked Luke up in his light blue 2003 Dodge
Caravan. They whistled the theme song to ``The Adams
Caravan. They whistled the theme song to ``The Addams
Family'' in perfect unison as they headed to the karate dojo
to learn some much needed self defense.
@ -99,7 +99,7 @@ Luke said.
Their laughter echoed throughout the otherwise quiet
Their laughter echoed through the otherwise quiet
neighborhood.

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@ -17,7 +17,7 @@ humanly possible.
{\em Who am I? Who amI? whoami?whoamiwhoam--}
{\em Who am I? Who amI? whoami?whoamiwhoam---}

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@ -178,7 +178,7 @@ wordlessly at each other, then she utters a soft cry and flees back into
the bathroom. I hear a soft click as she locks the door behind her.
I sigh and walk over, knocking on the door. ``Mrs. McCannshire, I'm sorry
about Jasper, okay? I shouldn't have\ldots done that, but he was, I mean he
about Jasper, okay? I shouldn't have\ldots{} done that, but he was, I mean he
was attacking me. There was nothing else I could do.''
I continued to apologize while I listened to her sobs, trying to look

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@ -73,7 +73,7 @@ large tracks.
Soon after this Brian started hearing noises from his closet again.
Soon after this, Brian started hearing noises from his closet again.
It was the same as before. All Brian could do was cower under the
sheets until the morning light returned.

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@ -373,7 +373,7 @@ fear.
I pointed at his dirty nut sack hanging from the bar. ``Fiend! You
I pointed at his dirty nut sack hanging from the bar. ``You fiend! You
almost crushed my ribs! You tried to dirty me with your geriatric
filth!''

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@ -10,7 +10,7 @@ to the center of the field. Looking out, he knew he had a long way
to go. His revolver sat snuggly in his jean pockets. He wasn't
afraid to use it if he was heard.
Luke's sneakers sunk into the moist soil, as he crept through the
Luke's white sneakers sunk into the moist soil, as he crept through the
corn field. He knew something was up. The full moon shined brightly
into the center of the corn field. In the center of the field stood
a mounted scarecrow. Its eyes beamed like an illuminating light,

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@ -17,8 +17,8 @@ It's what I do. My name is Luke Bavarious; hitman, soldier,
I had been called to this sweaty place, Arabia, to kill some guys.
This was an honorable job, a soldier's mission. ``We need some guys
killed so we called you'', they said on the phone. And here I was,
in this God-forsaken hellhole, hunched over this screen, hoping for
killed, so we called you'', they said on the phone. So here I was,
in this Godforsaken hellhole, hunched over this screen, hoping for
a morsel of communication from Home, something to feed my rotting
brain, to let me know that there was a Reason To Fight, To
Live.

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@ -1,4 +1,4 @@
\chapter{The Unexpected Shocking Surprise}
\chapter[The Surprise]{The Unexpected Shocking Surprise}
\by{antiloquax}
@ -43,10 +43,10 @@ Then he crept along the church.
As he tiptoed quietly through the rotting, crumbling church, he saw
that everything was black except for places that were illuminated
by the pale blue light of the moon. It was a full moon. A full moon
just like the night his father died.
As he tiptoed quietly through the rotting and crumbling church, he saw
that everything was black except for places that were illuminated by the
pale blue light of the moon. It was a full moon. A full moon just like
the night his father died.
@ -70,7 +70,7 @@ crucifix with gore and rust colored blood.
Luke Bavarious wanted to vomit, but not because of the head that
Luke Bavarious wanted to vomit---not because of the head that
had exploded and the brains that were on his clothes, but because
he had finally killed the man who had killed his father. The man
who had killed his father had never been caught.

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@ -2,7 +2,7 @@
\by{benitocereno}
Minutes later, to the sound of gunshots, Rogue Davix awoke from his
Minutes later, to the sound of gunshots, Rogue Davix aw\-oke from his
horrible dream. The lumps, all of the lumps, were nothing more than
a satanic vision. The dreams were always the same. Aliens,
darkness, another world. If he didn't have amnesia maybe he
@ -59,13 +59,12 @@ defying the gods trying to keep him down.
Luke was right, outside more sounds began to stir. The ghouls could
smell the evil cocktail of blood and vomit through the broken
window, and they were hungry. Luke handed Rogue his spare
Beretta.
smell the evil cocktail of blood and vomit wafting through the broken
window, and they were hungry. Luke handed Rogue his spare Beretta.
``I hope you know how to use this thing,'' he snarled
``I hope you know how to use this,'' he snarled
through his clenched teeth. Rogue popped the safety off.

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@ -62,7 +62,7 @@ be instantly caught by the keen eye of Bavarious.
There was a knock at his bedroom door and then it opened. Luke
There was a knock at his bedroom door, and it opened. Luke
Bavarious stood there and he said, ``I'm sorry, Kid, what you're
gotta live with is wrong. Just run back as quick as you can. Get in
your chair and I'll come in a bit later to shake him out of it. I

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@ -116,7 +116,7 @@ pick one out. This shit is expensive.
I raise the jewel encrusted ceremonial sacrificial dagger over
Bill's body. His eyes widen in terror. It's the only movement he's
capable of making, thanks to the knock-out/paralyzing toxic serum,
capable of making, thanks to the knock-out / paralyzing toxic serum,
which also wasn't cheap, by the way. I can't stress enough how much
money this whole thing has set me back.

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@ -197,7 +197,7 @@ infinite silken darkness.
But before the dissonance of that crazy awakening reaches its
But before the dissonance of that crazy awakening rea\-ches its
crescendo, I'm going to perform the one act remaining for me
in this world.

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@ -7,7 +7,7 @@ he had never seen before. Looking at his leg he saw his leg hair
barely coming in, because he was 8 years old and his age was
between 5 and 10.
``Barney it's time to stop dreaming!'' Barney's father, Aragorn,
``Barney it's time to stop dreaming!'' Barney's father, Ara\-gorn,
laboriously squeaked.
And then he saw the rectangle that he would instantly recognize in
@ -90,13 +90,8 @@ grandmother.
And he realized he could not stop the cubes, that he too would be
lost in the face of ev-
``BECAUSE I HAVE SEEN THE MOUNTAIN TOP AND UPON IS ARE
RECTANGLES!''
edited because I can, and because I only want a few misspellings in
my masterpiece.
``{\bf Because I have seen the mountain top and upon is are
rectangles}!''

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@ -22,7 +22,7 @@ Earlier that day a local kid had tried to stop Luke.
``Don't go to the haunted mansion. It's too
dangerous. It kills people. It never loses.''
``I think I can handle myself, kid.'' Luke said,
``I think I can handle myself, kid,'' Luke said,
smirking.
@ -54,7 +54,7 @@ back to again cover the furniture.
``Getting the treasure from this haunted mansion will be a
breeze.'' Luke asserted, smirking.
breeze,'' Luke asserted, smirking.
@ -62,7 +62,7 @@ The next room was a gigantic ball room with chandeliers and a
wooden floor. One wall was covered in old oil paintings. The other
wall was a gigantic window with giant red curtains. He could see
the garden. The hedges looked ominous. ``Probably plant
monsters.'' Luke murmured. He took a step into the room.
monsters,'' Luke murmured. He took a step into the room.
Suddenly, zombies were clawing their way out of the wooden floor.
Their empty eye sockets were slick with green rot. It glinted
sickly in the moon light. Luke's nostrils were attacked by
@ -129,7 +129,7 @@ dissolving.
``I'd better get out of here.'' Luke intoned,
``I'd better get out of here,'' Luke intoned,
smirking.
@ -150,7 +150,7 @@ appeared in front of him. It was the boy from before.
``The mansion never loses.'' The boy said, watching Luke
``The mansion never loses,'' the boy said, watching Luke
fall.
@ -164,7 +164,7 @@ acid.
``The mansion never loses.'' The boy repeated. He
``The mansion never loses,'' the boy repeated. He
smirked. Then he disappeared.

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@ -36,7 +36,7 @@ teeth glowing like the moon.
Suddenly, it started raining. The sky vomited it's tears on
Bavarius, thankfully he was wearing his hat. {\em Never leave home
without}, Bavarius mused. It was coming down in sheets, like
without it}, Bavarius mused. It was coming down in sheets, like
cats and dogs, and it made everything slick --- except for
Bavarius' vision, which was as sharp as ever.
@ -239,7 +239,7 @@ display.
The bloody vomit creature spattered all over Bavarius's face and
body. His white shirt was now rusty looking with blobs of trash
sticking to it. Bavarius could taste it --- not just the
creature'S gooey body but impending revenge.
creature's gooey body but impending revenge.
@ -253,7 +253,7 @@ it up.
Cocking his baretta, Bavarius stood and grinned. He knew what he
Cocking his Baretta, Bavarius stood and grinned. He knew what he
must do next. He knew it was going to be ugly. He took a nice long
drag from his stale smoke and exhaled. He placed that loaded gun
back into his rain soaked jacket pocket.

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@ -16,7 +16,7 @@ stairs.
It is there he witnessed a sight that made him vomit harder than he
It is there that he witnessed a sight that made him vomit harder than he
ever vomited before, a child who couldn't have been older
than a year or six was being raped by what he could only describe
as a extremely hairy ape.
@ -39,8 +39,8 @@ lifeless corpse of a dead man.
A closer examination gave room for the ugly truth, the bullet form
Luke's Beretta had penetrated the skull of the now lifeless
corpse who Luke Bavarius recognized as Raymond Von Strathburgh an
ultra conservative right wing Christian with a PHD in
corpse that Luke Bavarius recognized as belonging to Raymond Von Strathburgh: an
ultra-conservative right-wing Christian with a Ph.D.\ in
Creationism.
@ -60,7 +60,7 @@ inducing crime' to live.
Unwillingly Luke Bavarius raised his Beretta for the slaughter of
Unwillingly Luke raised his Beretta for the slaughter of
another innocent man, upon seeing Luke take aim the man froze with
fear while simultaneously shitting and pissing his pants, the
horror of the situation dawned upon Luke Bavarius as he decided to