From 3b68ce1ee3dd0609e4f7a5662ebacb5348059e71 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001
From: cruft <cruft@mailinator.com>
Date: Mon, 13 Jul 2009 23:22:44 -0600
Subject: [PATCH] Add art, fix quotes

---
 Makefile                                   |   3 +-
 THANKS                                     |   4 +
 art/blue-ribbon.eps                        | 216 ---------------------
 art/blue-ribbon.pdf                        | Bin 3577 -> 4552 bytes
 art/grenade.svg                            |  75 +++++++
 art/gun.png                                | Bin 4128 -> 0 bytes
 art/red-ribbon.eps                         | 216 ---------------------
 art/red-ribbon.pdf                         | Bin 3579 -> 4550 bytes
 art/white-ribbon.eps                       | 216 ---------------------
 art/white-ribbon.pdf                       | Bin 3581 -> 4553 bytes
 horrors2.ltx                               |   8 +-
 stories/BenBiddick.The_Artist.tex          |   4 +-
 stories/BenBiddick.Willy.tex               |   1 +
 stories/BoldFrankensteinMir.Johnny_the.tex |   5 +-
 stories/Livestock.Destiny_Ca.tex           |  32 ++-
 stories/Orgasmo.Make_My_Da.tex             |   8 +-
 stories/Smokey.Thursday.tex                |   2 +-
 stories/THE_WORST_DOCTOR.The_Snake_.tex    |   2 +-
 stories/ack_.The_Dock.tex                  |   4 +-
 stories/brylcreem.The_Creatu.tex           |   2 +-
 stories/kerimeton.White.tex                |   2 +-
 21 files changed, 115 insertions(+), 685 deletions(-)
 delete mode 100644 art/blue-ribbon.eps
 create mode 100644 art/grenade.svg
 delete mode 100644 art/gun.png
 delete mode 100644 art/red-ribbon.eps
 delete mode 100644 art/white-ribbon.eps

diff --git a/Makefile b/Makefile
index 616391a..943faab 100644
--- a/Makefile
+++ b/Makefile
@@ -1,7 +1,8 @@
 SUPPORT = chapauth.sty
 STORIES = stories/*.tex
+ART = art/*
 
-horrors2.pdf: horrors2.ltx $(SUPPORT) $(STORIES)
+horrors2.pdf: horrors2.ltx $(SUPPORT) $(STORIES) $(ART)
 	pdflatex $<
 	pdflatex $<
 
diff --git a/THANKS b/THANKS
index 55b2b76..5b7b806 100644
--- a/THANKS
+++ b/THANKS
@@ -16,6 +16,10 @@ Thanks to benitocereno for reminding me about the "any similarities"
 disclaimer, which probably has no legal weight whatsoever, but looks
 cool.
 
+Thanks to Ridgley_Fan for submitting *three* git patches, one of which
+had the cool idea of putting a Beretta image on the winning stories
+somewhere.
+
 Last but most, thanks to Ben Biddick for inspiring 117 crappy authors
 and one crappy bookmaker to come together for a great thing.  Terrible,
 yes; but great.
diff --git a/art/blue-ribbon.eps b/art/blue-ribbon.eps
deleted file mode 100644
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diff --git a/horrors2.ltx b/horrors2.ltx
index 4af2e16..c662780 100644
--- a/horrors2.ltx
+++ b/horrors2.ltx
@@ -15,6 +15,8 @@
 \TPGrid[\topmargin,\oddsidemargin]{8}{10}
 \setcounter{secnumdepth}{-1}
 
+\newcommand{\gun}{\includegraphics[height=1em]{art/gun.png}}
+
 \title{Horrors 2: Clever Title Here}
 \author{The Something Awful Forums}
 
@@ -106,6 +108,8 @@ and/or blood.  Stay strong, pukers.
 \part{Selections from {\em Horrors}}
 \include{stories/BenBiddick.The_Horrid}
 \include{stories/BenBiddick.The_Barn}
+\include{stories/BenBiddick.The_Artist}
+\include{stories/BenBiddick.Willy}
 
 \part{Apostles of Biddick}
 \include{stories/Orgasmo.Make_My_Da}
@@ -194,7 +198,7 @@ and/or blood.  Stay strong, pukers.
 %\include{stories/Hired_Gun.The_Bodies}
 \include{stories/Danger408.The_Torrid}
 \include{stories/Safe_Driver.Hell_Cab}
-%\include{stories/Livestock.Destiny_Ca}
+\include{stories/Livestock.Destiny_Ca}
 \include{stories/JohnnyThreeToes.Horrid_Tra}
 \include{stories/King_Plum_the_Nth.Flow_My_Te}
 \include{stories/Yogi_Byron.Horror_D_o}
@@ -219,7 +223,7 @@ and/or blood.  Stay strong, pukers.
 \include{stories/Dominic_Bones.Again}
 
 
-\part{Luke, {\em I} am your father}
+\part{Luke Bavarious, {\em I} am your father}
 \include{stories/Quovak.A_Cursed_M}
 \include{stories/Anal_Surgery.Satanic_Re}
 %\include{stories/Hantu.I__Lucius_}
diff --git a/stories/BenBiddick.The_Artist.tex b/stories/BenBiddick.The_Artist.tex
index 58829d6..b3412ed 100644
--- a/stories/BenBiddick.The_Artist.tex
+++ b/stories/BenBiddick.The_Artist.tex
@@ -1,4 +1,6 @@
-The Artist
+\chapimg{Discount\_Bees}{art/Discount_Bees-Artist.jpg}
+\chapauth{Ben Biddick}
+\chapter{The Artist}
 
 
 The satisfied young child sat on his favorite chair with his pens and
diff --git a/stories/BenBiddick.Willy.tex b/stories/BenBiddick.Willy.tex
index 59617b8..58ef1f5 100644
--- a/stories/BenBiddick.Willy.tex
+++ b/stories/BenBiddick.Willy.tex
@@ -1,3 +1,4 @@
+\chapimg{Discount\_Bees}{art/Discount_Bees-Willy.jpg}
 \chapauth{Ben Biddick}
 \chapter{Willy}
 
diff --git a/stories/BoldFrankensteinMir.Johnny_the.tex b/stories/BoldFrankensteinMir.Johnny_the.tex
index 880464e..c7eda96 100644
--- a/stories/BoldFrankensteinMir.Johnny_the.tex
+++ b/stories/BoldFrankensteinMir.Johnny_the.tex
@@ -1,5 +1,5 @@
 \chapauth{BoldFrankensteinMir}
-\chapter{Johnny the Knifer \textdagger \textdagger}
+\chapter{Johnny the Knifer}
 
 \begin{textblock}{1.5}(4.7,1)
 \begin{center}
@@ -9,9 +9,6 @@
 \end{textblock}
 
 \noindent I stopped short at the counter. I sat down. Coffee poured out the
-
-I stopped short at the counter. I sat down. Coffee poured out the
->>>>>>> Added gun logos, daggers, and apostle status for awardees:stories/BoldFrankensteinMir.Johnny_the.tex
 coffee pot and into my cup, like a pot of brown bullets shooting
 into my cup and splashing in coffee. The waitress was very pretty.
 She said ``would you like some coffee''? My name is Luke Bavarious. I
diff --git a/stories/Livestock.Destiny_Ca.tex b/stories/Livestock.Destiny_Ca.tex
index 77db05d..f9c19f4 100644
--- a/stories/Livestock.Destiny_Ca.tex
+++ b/stories/Livestock.Destiny_Ca.tex
@@ -75,12 +75,12 @@ midnight. Nothing happened.
 
 
 ``Damnit!'' Luke yelled. ``He calls every night. {\em Every
-night!}
+night!}''
 
 
 
-''It's probably just a prankster, Luke. Don't let it get you down.
-Anyway, maybe he got tired of calling you.``
+``It's probably just a prankster, Luke. Don't let it get you down.
+Anyway, maybe he got tired of calling you.''
 
 
 
@@ -94,7 +94,7 @@ Luke was least prepared for.
 
 
 
-''Not again!`` Luke yelled, staring at the ringing telephone. He
+``Not again!'' Luke yelled, staring at the ringing telephone. He
 debated answering, or letting it sing its horrible, shrill song.
 Finally, Luke could wait no more. He reached his left hand out and
 clutched the phone, squeezing so tight it would die if it were
@@ -102,35 +102,35 @@ alive.
 
 
 
-''Nice try, Luke. But you'll have to figure out who I am on your
-own.``
+``Nice try, Luke. But you'll have to figure out who I am on your
+own.''
 
 
 
-''Who are you?`` Luke demanded, his voice surging with anger.
+``Who are you?'' Luke demanded, his voice surging with anger.
 
 
 
-''Don't you know, Luke. Don't you know who I am?``
+``Don't you know, Luke. Don't you know who I am?''
 
 
 
-''It's only a matter of time before I find out.``
+``It's only a matter of time before I find out.''
 
 
 
-''Sooner than that, Luke. Don't you recognize my voice?``
+``Sooner than that, Luke. Don't you recognize my voice?''
 
 
 
-Suddenly a horrible realization came over Luke. ''No. No! No!!!`` he
+Suddenly a horrible realization came over Luke. ``No. No! No!!!'' he
 cried out. He looked to his right, and he was holding a second
 telephone.
 
 
 
-''All this time, Luke. It was you. It was me. It was
-{\em us}!"
+``All this time, Luke. It was you. It was me. It was
+{\em us}!''
 
 
 
@@ -138,10 +138,4 @@ Luke heard a click. He looked to his left. The telephone in his
 left hand was gone. Now it was a cocked Beretta pointed at his
 skull. Suddenly he gulped. {\em Click.} 
 
- 
-
-
-
-
-
 
diff --git a/stories/Orgasmo.Make_My_Da.tex b/stories/Orgasmo.Make_My_Da.tex
index 6bf10fd..0a9f52d 100644
--- a/stories/Orgasmo.Make_My_Da.tex
+++ b/stories/Orgasmo.Make_My_Da.tex
@@ -1,5 +1,5 @@
 \chapauth{Orgasmo}
-\chapter{Make My Day \textdagger \textdagger \textdagger}
+\chapter{Make My Day}
 
 \begin{textblock}{1.5}(4.7,1)
 \begin{center}
@@ -110,12 +110,12 @@ slurped it with his tongue.
 
 
 
-''Sir, please don't go out to the docks. I foresee something
-terrible happening.``
+``Sir, please don't go out to the docks. I foresee something
+terrible happening.''
 
 
 
-''Beat it, kid." I glared down at the rapscallion and pushed him
+``Beat it, kid.'' I glared down at the rapscallion and pushed him
 aside. He lost his balance and fell backwards into an open manhole
 cover. His yelp was cut off when he landed on a mangled shopping
 cart that lay at the bottom of the sewer and blood flew out of the
diff --git a/stories/Smokey.Thursday.tex b/stories/Smokey.Thursday.tex
index 6b55ab3..9406308 100644
--- a/stories/Smokey.Thursday.tex
+++ b/stories/Smokey.Thursday.tex
@@ -41,7 +41,7 @@ think about that!'' answered Luke.
 
 
 
-''You know what you'd like better than losing your virginity?''
+``You know what you'd like better than losing your virginity?''
 the man coyly asked. ``Never having sex, that's what!''
 
 
diff --git a/stories/THE_WORST_DOCTOR.The_Snake_.tex b/stories/THE_WORST_DOCTOR.The_Snake_.tex
index 1e2cd92..3e2ba4c 100644
--- a/stories/THE_WORST_DOCTOR.The_Snake_.tex
+++ b/stories/THE_WORST_DOCTOR.The_Snake_.tex
@@ -1,5 +1,5 @@
 \chapauth{THE WORST DOCTOR}
-\chapter{The Snake Lady \textdagger}
+\chapter{The Snake Lady}
 
 \begin{textblock}{1.5}(4.7,1)
 \begin{center}
diff --git a/stories/ack_.The_Dock.tex b/stories/ack_.The_Dock.tex
index a749179..b5de2be 100644
--- a/stories/ack_.The_Dock.tex
+++ b/stories/ack_.The_Dock.tex
@@ -98,11 +98,11 @@ lighted by the moonlight in the night sky. His thoughts settled as
 his memory cleared and the pain rose burning and bright like the
 devouring flares of the Sun.
 
-``No!! This was not me!!``
+``No!! This was not me!!''
 
 
 
-''You did this, Horace Manslasher. You took my family that day while
+``You did this, Horace Manslasher. You took my family that day while
 I was at the dock and no one would join me. Now I'm coming
 for you.'' 
  
diff --git a/stories/brylcreem.The_Creatu.tex b/stories/brylcreem.The_Creatu.tex
index 61c944d..437db51 100644
--- a/stories/brylcreem.The_Creatu.tex
+++ b/stories/brylcreem.The_Creatu.tex
@@ -41,7 +41,7 @@ and looked at her. And smiled!
 
 
 
-''Mommy? Where's Daddy?'' The questions kept
+``Mommy? Where's Daddy?'' The questions kept
 penetrating Louise's skull like a rusty icepick that had been
 left outside too long. Long enough to develop rust. Cancer for
 metal, Louise's father had always said in his father-voice. Now he
diff --git a/stories/kerimeton.White.tex b/stories/kerimeton.White.tex
index 65e9ad9..e12f2cd 100644
--- a/stories/kerimeton.White.tex
+++ b/stories/kerimeton.White.tex
@@ -33,7 +33,7 @@ ape.
 
 
 
-''Psychiatry``
+``Psychiatry''