\chapauth{Lord Humongus} \chapter{The Cellar Of Death} Luke walked down the house's scarred walls. The place was full of hate, he could feel it tingling in his bones. Like some sort of hate filled bastard feeling. {\em Filled with hate.} he dismissed the thought. His parents were moving thier stuff into the old, creaking hate filled house. Luke ran up to his obseqious parents, warnings of hate emerging from his mouth accompanied by the screeches of horror. His abusive father slapped him in the face and told him to ``Quit it, you dumb pecker.'' Luke couldn't. He had to warn them. Luke looked for anything to defend himself from the evil, but he found nothing. He looked throughout the house for something. Only to come up empty handed. He walked out of the door wondering about what he could do. He ran into Suzy, his sister, she teased him and called him a pussy. {\em She called me a cat that's not insulting why would she call me a cat?} thought Luke. The sun hid under the horizion. The screams of animals filling the empty night air. Luke arose from his bed. Suddenly a illmunescent gigantic head appeared in his room. It opened its lips to talk. All Luke could feel was hate in his brain. Nasty, painful hate. Luke awoke in his bed in the morning. He ran down to his parents screaming and screeching like some annoying owl. His father rose his hand. Luke closed his mouth shut. He wandered down into the lone cold cellar of the hate house. Looking for clues as to what was causing so much hate. He looked around the dusty cold floors. His came upon an old case full of dust. He opened the golden latches, looking for anything that might be a clue. Inside, was a horrible book. He knew what must cause the hate. This book. He threw it into the evening fire that was in the fireplace. His dad slapped him in the face for doing that but he thought to himself ``I just saved your life you fool.'' and smiled to himself because he was so smart and stuff and found out about the hate. But it didn't work he was wrong. The hate returned each night, and each day Luke received a slap to the face for being an annoying little mutant. He slept scared under his covers each night the horrible head would return to him and use all the hate and torture him with its 's telepathic mind full of hate and ire. He awoke every morning screaming at nothing. Until one night, he heard his parents scream. He ran to thier room to see them being dragged into a portal. A portal to hoboken. Luke laughed at them as they were sucked into a trailer park abyss. Full of people you didnt want to hang out with because they are all hate filled evil creatures from the third nuclear war. He hid the bodys in his bavarious cellar. They should've listened!