\chapauth{milkingmycow}
\chapter{Brain Freeze}

In the ubiquitous convenience store a very inconvenient truth was coming
to fruition. Gary Norbinton, age 11, jerked the cherry cola Slurpy lever
and set his cup to recieve the other worldly treat. He was about to be a
host, to have his mind and body taken over by unseen aliens lurking in
sweet frozen cherry murk.

``Hurry up now.'' his grandfather sputtered. ``My leg is getting
swollen.''

Suddenly Luke Bavarious kicked in the glass door with his gun
drawn. ``Kid, don't touch that!'' It was too late, he had already
sipped. Gary's eyes went cross and his complexion aquired a green
tint. Vomit spritzed out his ears. ``What's wrong son!?'' his
grandfather yelped.

``It's too late!'' Bavarious released the safety on his Baretta and took
aim, fired and split the kid's head open. Gary's eyes straightened. He
used his hands to push the sides of his skull back together and lurched
forward faster than any man has ever lurched ever.

``Please don't come again!'' the clerk cried as Gary ripped grandpa's
gamey leg off and chased Bavarious into the parking lot with it.

He took cover behind a rusty El Camino. The driver exclaimed, ``What the
hell is going on?''

``No time to explain!'' Bavarious yelled out. At that moment grandpa's
leg was hurled through the windshield with such force that it impaled
the driver where he sat. ``Son of a bitch!'' were his final words.

He put a bullet in Gary's leg and in his stomach. In both wounds, cherry
flavored carbonated frozen beverage exploded out of the holes. He was
unperturbed.

Bavarious opened the driver side door and pulled the leg impaled corpse
from the seat and got in. There was a box of bloody nachos on the
passenger seat. ``What a waste!'' He slammed the gear into reverse,
gunned it and aimed the car at Gary. Peeling out he aimed for the alien
but when he hit the boy's body it was the same as hitting a brick wall.

In a sinister alien barritone, the voice from another world in the body
of Gary Norbinton, age 11, came the words:

``We are here. We will kill you all, one by one. No mercy for the sugar
addicted monkey men who inhabit this planet. Surrender now!''

Bavarious checked the last round in the chamber. ``I better write my
name on that.'' he sighed sullenly.

\illustration{Discount\_Bees}{Brain Freeze}{art/Discount_Bees-Brain_Freeze.jpg}
