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2021-12-23 18:03:57 -07:00
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title: Every Episode of Doctor Who
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I'm going to try to watch every episode of Doctor Who, in order.
Then I'm going to write up what I think.
A few rules I'm setting out initially:
* It's okay to skip an episode if I just can't handle it.
* I don't have to write a big ol' treatise on each one.
* I fully understand I lack cultural and temporal context for a lot of this,
and I'm not going to feel bound to try and attain said.
* I will be viewing this though my personal biases.
* I may create more rules later on.
# Season One
## Story 1: Cavemen and Fire
I guess this first story pretty clearly established that they travel
through time.
### S01E01 - An Unearthly Child
Oh man, the pacing is just slow.
I like how they're exploring "what if a time-travelling alien disguised itself as a human and went to high school."
Okay, there are two high school teachers,
and this highschool aged timelord girl who's the Doctor's grand-daughter.
The doctor is kind of a jerk.
### S01E02 - The Cave of Skulls
Right, okay, cavemen. And of course they're all short-term-memory idiots.
Okay, sure.
### S01E03 - The Forest of Fear
I forgot what this one was about,
because I didn't decide to write things down until later.
### S01E04 - The Firemaker
The man teacher makes a fire because of course the man does that in 1963.
And then the leader of the cavemen goes hunting.
They make some skulls on fire to distract everybody,
which is pretty cool,
and then they escape.
## Story 2: Daleks!
Holy crap! I didn't realized the Daleks went all the way back to episode 4!
Also there are some Dutch-looking people who are of course the good guys.
### S01E05: The Dead Planet
They find a dead city which, oops, high background radiation.
Cool doors open up and some neat architecture.
You know what, for the time and (I assume) paltry budget of the first season,
this is pretty badass.
This Doctor is a jerk. Faking a broken part to force everyone to do what
he wants.
### S01E06: The Survivors
Daleks! It's cool that they waited until the second episode to bring them out.
They're pretty clearly assholes right at the outset here.
No moral ambiguity with the Daleks.
The Doctor is pretty frail. Honestly, the rest of the crew seems more
important than he is.
### S01E07: The Escape
I think we really meet the Norwegians here. I don't recall exactly.
I'm pretty sure this is the one where
the Norwegians try to meet up with the Daleks and forge a peace treaty,
not knowing the Daleks are complete assholes.
### S01E08: The Ambush
They start taking out the Daleks. There appears to be some sort of
creature inside, which can be taken out, and the dude teacher crawls in.
This is actually pretty cool, I liked this one.
### S01E09: The Expedition
I think the guy teacher tries to convince the peaceniks to fight the Daleks,
by presenting them with the possibility of him screwing up their stuff.
The Norwegians traipse around through some cool looking sets to
look like an alien landscape.
I think this is when the Daleks realize they need high background radiation
in order to survive, because the Norwegians (the Thaals I guess) anti-radiation
drug kills them. They plan to dump ionizing radiation onto the planet's
surface.
A Thaal dude goes to get water and gets sucked up by a vortex or something.
### S01E10: The Ordeal
Half the episode was watching people jump over a chasm in a cave.
The pacing on this, holy crap.
I think this is the one where the Doctor screws up their electrical grid.
### S01E11: The Rescue
Everybody runs around in the cave some more, and eventually they pop out
in the Dalek city.
The Doctor and his Grand-daughter
are imprisoned and he volunteers to teach them about his ship and how to
travel through time if they let him go.
The Norwegians and teachers rain holy hell and kill all the Daleks.
Everybody goes home.
Honestly, man, for being written 60 years ago, I'm surprised by how
compelling the Daleks were written when viewed by me today.
## Story 3: A Tardis Button Gets Stuck
This story was bathouse crazy.
Part of it was probably that I wasn't paying full attention,
but it was also just nuts.
### S01E12: The Edge of Destruction
People alternate between normal and crazy.
There's a lot of screaming.
Random weirdness takes place and it doesn't make sense.
Everybody turns of everybody and then suddenly it's fine and dandy.
### S01E13: The Brink of Disaster
The Doctor starts piecing together some clues.
Turns out the Tardis itself has been trying to send them a message
by dropping obscure clues.
He figures it out and unsticks the "go back to where you just were" button,
which, because it was stuck down, sent them back to the origin of the
solar system.
You know, not awful.
It felt pretty incoherent but I was willing to go along.
## Story 4: Doctor Who goes to China
I guess the film for this was lost,
so it was sort of a slideshow playing over a radio drama.
### S01E14: The Roof of the World
I made it as far as them getting into a hut in Mongolia and meeting
Marco Polo,
and then I skipped to the next story.
### S01E15: The Singing Sands
More British people pretending they're in China, I presume.
### S01E16: Five Hundred Eyes
Skipped
### S01E17: The Wall of Lies
Skipped
### S01E18: Rider from Shang Tu
Skipped
### S01E19: Mightly Kublai Khan
Skipped
### S01E20: Assassin at Peking
Skipped
## Story 5: Finding the Chips
The Scooby gang has to find some microchips scattered around the planet,
so a machine can be repaired to mind-control everyone into
being peaceful.
### S01E21: The Sea of Death
This was the episode during which I decided to start writing this.
It's really interesting how they kept the sort of stumbling around delivery
of lines, rather than shooting another take. I kind of like it.
It's like watching a play.
LOL at the alien costume with swim flippers.
Frickin' Susan is, disappointingly, pretty much a horror movie character.
Just sort of blithely wandering around all over the place and screaming
a lot. Amusingly, they just assumed it was her from her scream.
Okay, got the main plot point. The dude needs to recover some keys so they
can mind-control people to make everybody peaceful. I really hope they don't
just accept this without question.
Their mime acting could use some continuity work, LOL.
### S02E22: The Velvet Web
When the statue's eyes lit up and the creepy lady came out to put rocks
on everybody's forehead, it really felt like a 1970s episode from when
I was a kid.
Aww yeah, brains in jars getting killed.
### S02E23: The Screaming Jungle
The Screaming Jungle, eh? Must be about Susan.
For crying out loud, yep, she's screaming again.
I read that this actress quit early on.
I don't blame her. What a limiting role to have to play.
Now Barbara's screaming. A statue grabbed her.
Now she's screaming again. A net fell on her.
Third time screaming. Some plants grabbed her.
Apparently the scream in the jungle was mostly Barbara.
### S01E24: The Snows of Terror
Okay, now Ian and Barbara are cold. And a beardo has rescued them.
Ian left for some reason,
and Beardo's giving off some really rapey vibes.
Oh, sure enough, he's got all their junk.
Susan and a blonde woman are in a cave.
I've decided I don't like Susan at all,
her sole role appears to be screwing things up and screaming.
Oh boy. They're all in another cave, and they're going to explore it..
Oh, okay, we don't have to watch that. They melt some ice and...
Susan's screaming again as some dude with a cardboard sword wakes up.
Great, they found another key.
### S01E25: Sentence of Death
The Scooby gang vs. the Japanese Criminal System, I guess.
They assumed Ian is guilty and he has to prove he's not.
The Doctor is going to be his defense.
I've seen this episode at least three times on Star Trek,
and once on the Brady Bunch.
I might skip this one.
Oh, neat, a dude who hits his wife.
Okay, but you know what, I dig the costumes.
### S01E26: The Keys of Marinus
I don't like Barbara's hairstyle, though.
Oh, snap! What a twist! I seriously was not expecting this one.
I mean, I probably should have, from a casting standpoint, but I'm not
really devoting a lot of mental energy to this.
Okay, I guess they decided the mind-control machine wasn't so great.
Kind of a naive take but whatever, it was a pretty fun story.
## Story 6: Doctor Who goes to Mexico
A bunch of white people pretend to be Aztecs, and explore the moral
aspects of human sacrifice.
To its credit, there is at least lip service to the notion that
this is some other culture and maybe you can't impose your current moral
structure over it.
### S01E27: The Temple of Evil
Oh goodie. Barbara's gone and gotten herself in trouble again.
I'm not sure I can stomach this one.
Yay, let's focus on human sacrifice. And let's frame it as summoning rain,
because I'm sure that was the beginning and end of the philosophy behind it.
LOL the sword fight.
Haha, Susan's screaming desecrated an Aztec temple.
### S01E28: The Warriors of Death
Damn, the Doctor's pissed.
Holy crap, the Vulcan Nerve Pinch! 2 years before it showed up in Star Trek!
More 1960s dudes wrasslin'. But there's a twist, he got scratched.
### S01E29: The Bride of Sacrifice
Aha, the old Saffron maneuver, eh? Looks like the Doctor's gettin' hitched!
The gang has a moral dilemma about altering the culture of the Aztecs by
Barbara abusing her god status to outlaw human sacrifice. The Doctor gets
married or engaged or something. Susan finally expresses an emotion other
than terror:
![well hello there](susan-well-hello-there.mp4)
I'm back to being uncomfortable with the cultural framing here. I mean,
maybe this is useful for viewing 1960s British culture, but that's still
too recent for me to not feel squicky about it. The only reason I didn't
skip this entire story is because Wikipedia said it was one of the best
stories of the entire franchise.
### S01E30: The Day of Darkness
They found a tunnel or something, to get back into the burial chamber
containing the Tardis. Susan is going to get married or sacrificed or
something. Ian does the Vulcan Nerve Pinch on a white guy dressed as a
brown guy, saving the white lady. They find a way to escape, and
somebody gets sacrificed, and then Barbara gets to watch Susan get
sacrificed or something, I'm not sure.
Oh, more 1960s dudes fighting. I skipped it. I presume the British
high school teacher beats the Aztec warrior who's been training his
entire life.
Barbara has some sort of moral quandry about her inability to change
the past, which I guess was the point of the story. I sure hope
they don't wind up on earth again in the next story.
## Story 7: The Sensorites
### S01E31: Strangers in Space
They're in a spaceship, thank goodness. The lighting is pretty bad.
Okay there are these sensorites messing with peoples' minds. Aw, crap,
we're sort of on Earth. At least it's in the future.
This is a cool premise,
taking over a ship by manipulating everybody's emotions.
### S01E32: The Unwilling Warriors
Hey! Creepy! I like this story.
Susan is doing something! Nice!
Susan makes a sacrifice
### S01E33: Hidden Danger
Susan needs to get out of this place! The Doctor's being a real jerk. Again.
Seems like she's growing up and needs her own space.
Anyway. The Sensorites are cool. And I'm glad Barbara seems to get an equal
say in matters. Like, she just argued with Ian about something, and she was
like "well then it's settled, we'll do it my way".
Still can't abide her hairstyle, though.
Ian seems really British. It's not difficult to imagine pretty much
everything he does being done by an older dude with a brandy in his hand.
He doesn't seem to get to grow as a character,
he's already fully grown, I guess.
I dig that the sensorites have internal debates.
## Story 8: Dr Who vs the French Revolution
I just couldn't get myself to care about another one of these.