From 3bedbfc80da67aff98e36251b3260444be3dfb19 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Neale Pickett Date: Tue, 26 Sep 2023 10:31:11 -0600 Subject: [PATCH] High school reunion --- .../2023/09-26-high-school-reunion/index.md | 55 +++++++++++++++++++ 1 file changed, 55 insertions(+) create mode 100644 content/blog/2023/09-26-high-school-reunion/index.md diff --git a/content/blog/2023/09-26-high-school-reunion/index.md b/content/blog/2023/09-26-high-school-reunion/index.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..02918e1 --- /dev/null +++ b/content/blog/2023/09-26-high-school-reunion/index.md @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +--- +title: High School Reunion +date: 2023-09-26 +--- + +> ... many of us have simply moved on from high school, +> and feel no need to revisit the awkward hallways of our youth. + +- [Laura Tartocci, Ph.D.](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/you-can-t-sit-us/202203/should-you-go-your-high-school-reunion) + +--- + +A few people from high school keep reaching out to me, +year after year, +asking if I'm going to the reunion this year. + +I am not. + +Every time this question is asked, +I feel compelled to explain my reasoning, +in the kind of overly-introspective detail that was the hallmark of my high school existence. +*I am no longer like this*, +it only happens when someone from high school brings up high school in the context of high school. + +It feels like being in high school all over again. +And that's just answering an email! +I shudder to think how it would feel to be surrounded by the same people, +in the same environment. + +I don't want to go back to the person I was in high school. +I like the person I am now, +and I acknowledge that high school me and college me were necessary steps toward adult me. +But I have no desire to revisit actually being that person, +and it's clear that every time I even approach that context, +I slip right back into that place. + +Going to the reunion would not be healthy for me. +It would not help me "close out" any embarassment or hurt feelings. +It would not provide me an opportunity to "make up" for the things I still regret, 30+ years later. +People I think would make good friends now would continue to be inaccessible to me, +*because they have moved on*. +Old crushes that I forgot in college would still trigger a spark, +and a few days isn't enough time to work past that. +My bullies might make some attempt to apologize, which would be awkward, +or they might not, which would be aggravating. +People I got along with back then, yeah, I'd still get along with them. +*But most of those people are already keeping in touch with me!* + +I can't see this playing out any other way than the old cliques re-forming. +That is not my idea of a good time. + +I understand that this calculation is different for everyone. +But +I personally have nothing to gain from going to the reunion, +and a whole lot to lose.