Merge branch 'main' of https://git.woozle.org/neale/homepage

content/blog/2023/09-26-high-school-reunion/index.md

@@ -16,40 +16,10 @@ asking if I'm going to the reunion this year.
 
 I am not.
 
-Every time this question is asked,
+I like the person I am now!
-I feel compelled to explain my reasoning,
+I acknowledge that high school me and college me were necessary steps toward adult me,
-in the kind of overly-introspective detail that was the hallmark of my high school existence.
+but stepping into my high school shoes again is not an appealing proposition.
-*I am no longer like this*,
-it only happens when someone from high school brings up high school in the context of high school.
-
-It feels like being in high school all over again.
-And that's just answering an email!
-I shudder to think how it would feel to be surrounded by the same people,
-in the same environment.
-
-I don't want to go back to the person I was in high school.
-I like the person I am now,
-and I acknowledge that high school me and college me were necessary steps toward adult me.
-But I have no desire to revisit actually being that person,
-and it's clear that every time I even approach that context,
-I slip right back into that place.
-
-Going to the reunion would not be healthy for me.
-It would not help me "close out" any embarassment or hurt feelings.
-It would not provide me an opportunity to "make up" for the things I still regret, 30+ years later.
-People I think would make good friends now would continue to be inaccessible to me,
-*because they have moved on*.
-Old crushes that I forgot in college would still trigger a spark,
-and a few days isn't enough time to work past that.
-My bullies might make some attempt to apologize, which would be awkward,
-or they might not, which would be aggravating.
-People I got along with back then, yeah, I'd still get along with them.
-*But most of those people are already keeping in touch with me!*
-
-I can't see this playing out any other way than the old cliques re-forming.
-That is not my idea of a good time.
 
 I understand that this calculation is different for everyone.
 But 
-I personally have nothing to gain from going to the reunion,
+I personally have little to gain from going to the reunion.
-and a whole lot to lose.