horrors2

Akbar.Wicked_Wor.tex

  1\chapauth{Akbar}
  2\chapter{Wicked Workout}
  3
  4
  5
  6Luke Bavarious was on the prowl. Earlier that night, the detective
  7had received notice from the chief that some unidentified killer
  8was stalking the Upper East Side. Already five had been found dead.
  9Each was murdered in the same gruesome fashion: arms hyperextended,
 10hair ripped out to the follicle, legs bowed at the knees as if the
 11ligaments were carefully torn, and finally, a smile carved across
 12the face wide enough to completely cover the corpse in its own
 13liquid lifeforce.
 14
 15
 16
 17{\em What kind of goddamn maniac are we dealing with here? The
 18Joker?} Bavarious thinks to himself as he carefully primes his
 19trusty Baretta, referencing the recent Batman film. He tenderly
 20fingers the safety. He steps out of his Ford Pinto into the cool
 21New York night.
 22
 23
 24
 25He stalks the sidewalks seeing nothing but the steam rising out of
 26the sewers onto the dim streets. His eyes are optic daggers,
 27piercing into the darkness. His muscles are taut, ready to unleash
 28the leaden payload of his sidearm into villainous flesh. He sees
 29the telltale trail of fresh blood on the pavement.
 30
 31
 32
 33{\em It's on.}
 34
 35
 36
 37As he follows the sanguine highway into the alley behind a 24-Hour
 38Fitness, he begins to hear a slow pounding in the night air. Slowly
 39but surely, it grows louder and louder as he approaches the
 40wellspring of the molten vein-magma. Before, it was just a
 41thumping. Now, however, it is more recognizable: a beat. A melody.
 42A hot sensation rushes through Bavarious' body.
 43
 44
 45
 46``Dance music!'' he ejaculates softly as he creeps to the
 47source: a partially-open doorway flooding the shadowy alleyway with
 48light. He nudges the door with his foot and peers into the hell
 49below. Bodies! Dozens of them. Strung up by the arms on chains
 50attached to huge meathooks, their feet barely reaching the ground.
 51The bodies were jerked hardily up and down to the cadence of the
 52music. Their arms strained against the tension. Their legs slapped
 53against the concrete floor over and over, as if horrifically
 54tapping along to the beat. The battered limbs heaved droplets of
 55blood and pulverized bone into the air. In front of them all was a
 56horrid taskmaster.
 57
 58
 59
 60``Up and kick and down and step and up and kick
 61and{\ldots} {\bf remember to smile!}''
 62
 63
 64
 65Bavarious could only see the back of the man, but he was already
 66repulsed to the point of vomiting. Dressed only in a red jersey,
 67dolphin shorts, and running shoes, the short man runs to and fro in
 68front of his victims, only a handful of which that were still
 69conscious or alive. The tormentor's bouffant hair bounces as
 70he taunts the wounded. The killer then takes out a wicked curve
 71blade out of his shorts and carves open a pleading woman's
 72face, laughing as he watches her throw up her fluid
 73existence.
 74
 75
 76
 77{\em What the hell is this?} Bavarious thinks as he makes sure
 78that his Baretta is locked and loaded, regurgitated chicken dinner
 79still spewing out of his mouth. Jumping up, he yells out:
 80
 81
 82
 83``{\bf Freeze! This is detective Bavarious of the NYPD! I have a
 84Baretta locked onto your head and I will fire if you do not
 85comply}!''
 86
 87
 88
 89The demon in front of him does not. Instead, he leaps otherwordly
 90to the right, launching his disgusting body as approximately
 91fifty-five miles per hour. Bavarious reacts with equal speed,
 92letting loose with half a score of death slugs. All of them hit as
 93the swiss-cheesed body hits the floor with a thud. Bavarious races
 94up to confirm his kill, wiping away the now-crusty sick on his
 95chin.
 96
 97
 98
 99Rather than a cadaver, however, he sees only the man, still facing
100away from him. Still on his feet. Still alive. Filled with dread,
101Bavarious unloads another barrage of rounds from his only true
102friend, the Baretta he keeps on his hip. The bullets zip through
103the gym teacher from hell as if nothing was there. In their wake,
104they leave gaping holes that eject a clear liquid. The vitreous
105material tumbles out of the entry wounds like a rain. A shower of
106translucent gymnasts somersaulting through the air. The gashes
107slowly close and leave no trace of their former existence, even in
108the man's clothing.
109
110
111
112``{\bf What the hell are you}?!'' the detective screams as he
113discharges the rest of his lethal cargo, again to no avail. The man
114finally slowly begins to turn around, revealing his bloated
115face.
116
117
118
119``Richard{\ldots}Simmons{\ldots}?'' Bavarious murmurs
120into the air, putrid with aerosolized human body parts.
121
122
123
124``No,'' the man says as he fully presents himself, and
125then rips off his face revealing another underneath. It is an oddly
126familiar visage. ``I'm you.''
127
128
129
130Both Luke Bavariouses vomit. Tears.
131
132
133 
134
135
136