diff --git a/OMakefile b/OMakefile
index 50d5312..a6364f3 100644
--- a/OMakefile
+++ b/OMakefile
@@ -5,7 +5,7 @@ OCAMLCFLAGS += -g
 
 .DEFAULT: bot
 
-OCamlProgram(bot, bot irc command iobuf dispatch)
+OCamlProgram(bot, bot irc command iobuf dispatch cdb)
 
 section
 	OCAMLPACKS[] +=
diff --git a/bot.ml b/bot.ml
index d26528f..b48ed40 100644
--- a/bot.ml
+++ b/bot.ml
@@ -1,3 +1,16 @@
+let info_db = Cdb.open_cdb_in "/home/neale/src/firebot/info.cdb"
+let _ = Random.self_init ()
+
+let choice l =
+  let n = Random.int (List.length l) in
+    List.nth l n
+
+let get_one key =
+  let matches = Cdb.get_matches info_db key in
+  match Stream.npeek 120 matches with
+    | [] -> raise Not_found
+    | keys -> choice keys
+
 let write iobuf command args text =
   let cmd = Command.create None command args text in
     print_endline ("--> " ^ (Command.as_string cmd));
@@ -12,6 +25,24 @@ let handle_command iobuf cmd =
         write iobuf "JOIN" ["#bot"] None
     | (Some who, "JOIN", [], Some chan) ->
         write iobuf "PRIVMSG" [chan] (Some "hi asl")
+    | (Some who, "PRIVMSG", [target], Some text) ->
+        if target.[0] = '#' then
+          try
+            let factoid = get_one text in
+            let response = 
+              match factoid.[0] with
+                | ':' ->
+                    "\001ACTION " ^ (Str.string_after factoid 1) ^ "\001"
+                | '\\' ->
+                    Str.string_after factoid 1
+                | _ ->
+                    Printf.sprintf "Gosh, %s, I think %s is %s" who text factoid
+            in
+            write iobuf "PRIVMSG" [target] (Some response)
+          with Not_found ->
+            ()
+        else
+          ()
     | _ ->
         ()
 
diff --git a/cdb.ml b/cdb.ml
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..85e6f05
--- /dev/null
+++ b/cdb.ml
@@ -0,0 +1,309 @@
+(*
+ * Copyright (c) 2003  Dustin Sallings <dustin@spy.net>
+ *
+ * arch-tag: 1E3B7401-2AE1-11D8-A379-000393CB0F1E
+ *)
+
+(** CDB Implementation.
+ {{:http://cr.yp.to/cdb/cdb.txt} http://cr.yp.to/cdb/cdb.txt}
+ *)
+
+(* The cdb hash function is ``h = ((h << 5) + h) ^ c'', with a starting
+   hash of 5381.
+ *)
+
+(** CDB creation handle. *)
+type cdb_creator = {
+	table_count: int array;
+	(* Hash index pointers *)
+	mutable pointers: (Int32.t * Int32.t) list;
+	out: out_channel;
+}
+
+(** Initial hash value *)
+let hash_init = Int64.of_int 5381
+
+let ff64 = Int64.of_int 0xff
+(* I need to do this of_string because it's larger than an ocaml int *)
+let ffffffff64 = Int64.of_string "0xffffffff"
+let ff32 = Int32.of_int 0xff
+
+(** Hash the given string. *)
+let hash s =
+	let h = ref hash_init in
+	String.iter (fun c -> h := Int64.logand ffffffff64 (Int64.logxor
+								(Int64.add (Int64.shift_left !h 5) !h)
+								(Int64.of_int (int_of_char c)))
+						) s;
+	Int64.to_int32 !h
+
+let write_le cdc i =
+	output_byte cdc.out (i land 0xff);
+	output_byte cdc.out ((i lsr 8) land 0xff);
+	output_byte cdc.out ((i lsr 16) land 0xff);
+	output_byte cdc.out ((i lsr 24) land 0xff)
+
+(** Write a little endian integer to the file *)
+let write_le32 cdc i =
+	output_byte cdc.out (Int32.to_int (Int32.logand ff32 i));
+	output_byte cdc.out (Int32.to_int
+	 (Int32.logand ff32 (Int32.shift_right_logical i 8)));
+	output_byte cdc.out (Int32.to_int
+	 (Int32.logand ff32 (Int32.shift_right_logical i 16)));
+	output_byte cdc.out (Int32.to_int
+		(Int32.logand ff32 (Int32.shift_right_logical i 24)))
+
+(**
+	Open a cdb creator for writing.
+
+ 	@param fn the file to write
+ *)
+let open_out fn =
+	let s = {	table_count=Array.make 256 0;
+				pointers=[];
+				out=open_out_bin fn
+			} in
+	(* Skip over the header *)
+	seek_out s.out 2048;
+	s
+
+(**
+	Convert out_channel to cdb_creator.
+
+ 	@param out_channel the out_channel to convert
+ *)
+let cdb_creator_of_out_channel out_channel =
+	let s = {	table_count=Array.make 256 0;
+				pointers=[];
+				out=out_channel
+			} in
+	(* Skip over the header *)
+	seek_out s.out 2048;
+	s
+
+let hash_to_table h =
+	Int32.to_int (Int32.logand h ff32)
+
+let hash_to_bucket h len =
+	Int32.to_int (Int32.rem (Int32.shift_right_logical h 8) (Int32.of_int len))
+
+let pos_out_32 x =
+	Int64.to_int32 (LargeFile.pos_out x)
+
+(** Add a value to the cdb *)
+let add cdc k v =
+	(* Add the hash to the list *)
+	let h = hash k in
+	cdc.pointers <- (h, pos_out_32 cdc.out) :: cdc.pointers;
+	let table = hash_to_table h in
+	cdc.table_count.(table) <- cdc.table_count.(table) + 1;
+
+	(* Add the data to the file *)
+	write_le cdc (String.length k);
+	write_le cdc (String.length v);
+	output_string cdc.out k;
+	output_string cdc.out v
+
+(** Process a hash table *)
+let process_table cdc table_start slot_table slot_pointers i tc =
+	(* Length of the table *)
+	let len = tc * 2 in
+	(* Store the table position *)
+	slot_table := (pos_out_32 cdc.out, Int32.of_int len) :: !slot_table;
+	(* Build the hash table *)
+	let ht = Array.make len None in
+	let cur_p = ref table_start.(i) in
+	(* Lookup entries by slot number *)
+	let lookupSlot x =
+		try Hashtbl.find slot_pointers x
+		with Not_found -> (Int32.zero,Int32.zero)
+	in
+	(* from 0 to tc-1 because the loop will run an extra time otherwise *)
+	for u = 0 to (tc - 1) do
+		let hp = lookupSlot !cur_p in
+		cur_p := !cur_p + 1;
+
+		(* Find an available hash bucket *)
+		let rec find_where where =
+                  match ht.(where) with
+                    | None ->
+			where
+                    | _ ->
+			if ((where + 1) = len) then (find_where 0)
+			else (find_where (where + 1))
+                in
+		let where = find_where (hash_to_bucket (fst hp) len) in
+		ht.(where) <- Some hp;
+	done;
+	(* Write this hash table *)
+	Array.iter (fun hpp ->
+			let h,t = match hpp with
+		  		None -> Int32.zero,Int32.zero
+				| Some(h,t) -> h,t;
+			in
+			write_le32 cdc h; write_le32 cdc t
+		) ht
+
+(** Close and finish the cdb creator. *)
+let close_cdb_out cdc =
+	let cur_entry = ref 0 in
+	let table_start = Array.make 256 0 in
+	(* Find all the hash starts *)
+	Array.iteri (fun i x ->
+		cur_entry := !cur_entry + x;
+		table_start.(i) <- !cur_entry) cdc.table_count;
+	(* Build out the slot pointers hash *)
+	let slot_pointers = Hashtbl.create (List.length cdc.pointers) in
+	(* Fill in the slot pointers *)
+	List.iter (fun hp ->
+		let h = fst hp in
+		let table = hash_to_table h in
+		table_start.(table) <- table_start.(table) - 1;
+		Hashtbl.replace slot_pointers table_start.(table) hp;
+		) cdc.pointers;
+	(* Write the shit out *)
+	let slot_table = ref [] in
+	(* Write out the hash tables *)
+	Array.iteri (process_table cdc table_start slot_table slot_pointers)
+		cdc.table_count;
+	(* write out the pointer sets *)
+	seek_out cdc.out 0;
+	List.iter (fun x -> write_le32 cdc (fst x); write_le32 cdc (snd x))
+		(List.rev !slot_table);
+	close_out cdc.out
+
+(** {1 Iterating a cdb file} *)
+
+(* read a little-endian integer *)
+let read_le f =
+	let a = (input_byte f) in
+	let b = (input_byte f) in
+	let c = (input_byte f) in
+	let d = (input_byte f) in
+	a lor (b lsl 8) lor (c lsl 16) lor (d lsl 24)
+
+(* Int32 version of read_le *)
+let read_le32 f =
+	let a = (input_byte f) in
+	let b = (input_byte f) in
+	let c = (input_byte f) in
+	let d = (input_byte f) in
+	Int32.logor (Int32.of_int (a lor (b lsl 8) lor (c lsl 16)))
+				(Int32.shift_left (Int32.of_int d) 24)
+
+(**
+ Iterate a CDB.
+
+ @param f the function to call for every key/value pair
+ @param fn the name of the cdb to iterate
+ *)
+let iter f fn =
+	let fin = open_in_bin fn in
+	try
+		(* Figure out where the end of all data is *)
+		let eod = read_le32 fin in
+		(* Seek to the record section *)
+		seek_in fin 2048;
+		let rec loop() =
+			(* (pos_in fin) < eod *)
+			if (Int32.compare (Int64.to_int32 (LargeFile.pos_in fin)) eod < 0)
+				then (
+				let klen = read_le fin in
+				let dlen = read_le fin in
+				let key = String.create klen in
+				let data = String.create dlen in
+				really_input fin key 0 klen;
+				really_input fin data 0 dlen;
+				f key data;
+				loop()
+			) in
+		loop();
+		close_in fin;
+	with x -> close_in fin; raise x;
+
+(** {1 Searching } *)
+
+(** Type type of a cdb_file. *)
+type cdb_file = {
+	f: in_channel;
+	(* Position * length *)
+	tables: (Int32.t * int) array;
+}
+
+(** Open a CDB file for searching.
+
+ @param fn the file to open
+ *)
+let open_cdb_in fn =
+	let fin = open_in_bin fn in
+	let tables = Array.make 256 (Int32.zero,0) in
+	(* Set the positions and lengths *)
+	Array.iteri (fun i it ->
+		let pos = read_le32 fin in
+		let len = read_le fin in
+		tables.(i) <- (pos,len)
+		) tables;
+	{f=fin; tables=tables}
+
+(**
+ Close a cdb file.
+
+ @param cdf the cdb file to close
+ *)
+let close_cdb_in cdf =
+	close_in cdf.f
+
+(** Get a stream of matches.
+
+ @param cdf the cdb file
+ @param key the key to search
+ *)
+let get_matches cdf key =
+	let kh = hash key in
+	(* Find out where the hash table is *)
+	let hpos, hlen = cdf.tables.(hash_to_table kh) in
+	let rec loop x =
+		if(x >= hlen) then (
+			None
+		) else (
+			(* Calculate the slot containing these entries *)
+			let lslot = ((hash_to_bucket kh hlen) + x) mod hlen in
+			let spos = Int32.add (Int32.of_int (lslot * 8)) hpos in
+			LargeFile.seek_in cdf.f (Int64.of_int32 spos);
+			let h = read_le32 cdf.f in
+			let pos = read_le32 cdf.f in
+			(* validate that we a real bucket *)
+			if (h = kh) && ((Int32.compare pos Int32.zero) > 0) then (
+				LargeFile.seek_in cdf.f (Int64.of_int32 pos);
+				let klen = read_le cdf.f in
+				if (klen = String.length key) then (
+					let dlen = read_le cdf.f in
+					let rkey = String.create klen in
+					really_input cdf.f rkey 0 klen;
+					if(rkey = key) then (
+						let rdata = String.create dlen in
+						really_input cdf.f rdata 0 dlen;
+						Some(rdata)
+					) else (
+						loop (x + 1)
+					)
+				) else (
+					loop (x + 1)
+				)
+			) else (
+				loop (x + 1)
+			)
+		) in
+	Stream.from loop
+
+(**
+ Find the first record with the given key.
+
+ @param cdf the cdb_file
+ @param key the key to find
+ *)
+let find cdf key =
+	try
+		Stream.next (get_matches cdf key)
+	with Stream.Failure ->
+		raise Not_found
diff --git a/cdb.mli b/cdb.mli
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..e78aa22
--- /dev/null
+++ b/cdb.mli
@@ -0,0 +1,40 @@
+
+(** CDB Implementation.
+ {{:http://cr.yp.to/cdb/cdb.txt} http://cr.yp.to/cdb/cdb.txt}
+ *)
+
+(** {1 Utilities} *)
+val hash : string -> int32
+
+(** {1 Building a CDB } *)
+
+type cdb_creator = {
+  table_count : int array;
+  mutable pointers : (Int32.t * Int32.t) list;
+  out : out_channel;
+}
+val open_out : string -> cdb_creator
+val cdb_creator_of_out_channel : Pervasives.out_channel -> cdb_creator
+val add : cdb_creator -> string -> string -> unit
+val close_cdb_out : cdb_creator -> unit
+
+(** {1 Iterating a CDB } *)
+
+val iter : (string -> string -> unit) -> string -> unit
+
+(** {1 Searching } *)
+
+type cdb_file = {
+	f: in_channel;
+	tables: (Int32.t * int) array;
+}
+
+val open_cdb_in : string -> cdb_file
+val close_cdb_in : cdb_file -> unit
+
+val get_matches : cdb_file -> string -> string Stream.t
+val find : cdb_file -> string -> string
+
+(*
+ * arch-tag: 55F4CBF0-2B50-11D8-BEDC-000393CFE6B8
+ *)