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@ -39,7 +39,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"A day for firm decisions! Or is it?",
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"A few hours grace before the madness begins again.",
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"A gift of a flower will soon be made to you.",
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"A long-forgotten loved one will appear soon. Buy the negatives at any price.",
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"A tall, dark stranger will have more fun than you.",
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"A visit to a fresh place will bring strange work.",
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"A visit to a strange place will bring fresh work.",
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@ -48,8 +47,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Accent on helpful side of your nature. Drain the moat.",
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"Advancement in position.",
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"After your lover has gone you will still have PEANUT BUTTER!",
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"Afternoon very favorable for romance. Try a single person for a change.",
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"Alimony and bribes will engage a large share of your wealth.",
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"All the troubles you have will pass away very quickly.",
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"Among the lucky, you are the chosen one.",
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"An avocado-tone refrigerator would look good on your resume.",
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@ -61,18 +58,15 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Are you sure the back door is locked?",
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"Artistic ventures highlighted. Rob a museum.",
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"Avert misunderstanding by calm, poise, and balance.",
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"Avoid gunfire in the bathroom tonight.",
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"Avoid reality at all costs.",
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"Bank error in your favor. Collect $200.",
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"Be careful! Is it classified?",
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"Be careful! UGLY strikes 9 out of 10!",
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"Be cautious in your daily affairs.",
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"Be cheerful while you are alive. -- Phathotep, 24th Century B.C.",
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"Be different: conform.",
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"Be free and open and breezy! Enjoy! Things won't get any better so get used to it.",
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"Be security conscious -- National defense is at stake.",
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"Beauty and harmony are as necessary to you as the very breath of life.",
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"Best of all is never to have been born. Second best is to die soon.",
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"Better hope the life-inspector doesn't come around while you have your life in such a mess.",
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"Beware of a dark-haired man with a loud tie.",
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"Beware of a tall black man with one blond shoe.",
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@ -80,8 +74,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Beware of Bigfoot!",
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"Beware of low-flying butterflies.",
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"Beware the one behind you.",
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"Blow it out your ear.",
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"Break into jail and claim police brutality.",
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"Bridge ahead. Pay troll.",
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"Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.",
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"Caution: Keep out of reach of children.",
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@ -98,7 +90,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Do not overtax your powers.",
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"Do not sleep in a eucalyptus tree tonight.",
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"Do nothing unless you must, and when you must act -- hesitate.",
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"Do something unusual today. Pay a bill.",
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"Do what comes naturally. Seethe and fume and throw a tantrum.",
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"Domestic happiness and faithful friends.",
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"Don't feed the bats tonight.",
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@ -111,7 +102,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Don't look back, the lemmings are gaining on you.",
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"Don't look now, but the man in the moon is laughing at you.",
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"Don't look now, but there is a multi-legged creature on your shoulder.",
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"Don't plan any hasty moves. You'll be evicted soon anyway.",
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"Don't read any sky-writing for the next two weeks.",
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"Don't read everything you believe.",
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"Don't relax! It's only your tension that's holding you together.",
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@ -123,7 +113,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Everything that you know is wrong, but you can be straightened out.",
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"Everything will be just tickety-boo today.",
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"Excellent day for putting Slinkies on an escalator.",
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"Excellent day to have a rotten day.",
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"Excellent time to become a missing person.",
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"Executive ability is prominent in your make-up.",
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"Exercise caution in your daily affairs.",
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@ -135,15 +124,11 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Generosity and perfection are your everlasting goals.",
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"Give him an evasive answer.",
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"Give thought to your reputation. Consider changing name and moving to a new town.",
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"Give your very best today. Heaven knows it's little enough.",
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"Go to a movie tonight. Darkness becomes you.",
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"Good day for a change of scene. Repaper the bedroom wall.",
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"Good day for overcoming obstacles. Try a steeplechase.",
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"Good day to deal with people in high places; particularly lonely stewardesses.",
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"Good day to let down old friends who need help.",
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"Good news from afar can bring you a welcome visitor.",
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"Good news. Ten weeks from Friday will be a pretty good day.",
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"Good night to spend with family, but avoid arguments with your mate's new lover.",
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"Green light in A.M. for new projects. Red light in P.M. for traffic tickets.",
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"Hope that the day after you die is a nice day.",
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"If you can read this, you're too close.",
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@ -153,7 +138,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens tomorrow!",
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"If your life was a horse, you'd have to shoot it.",
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"In the stairway of life, you'd best take the elevator.",
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"Increased knowledge will help you now. Have mate's phone bugged.",
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"Is that really YOU that is reading this?",
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"Is this really happening?",
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"It may or may not be worthwhile, but it still has to be done.",
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@ -190,7 +174,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Ships are safe in harbor, but they were never meant to stay there.",
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"Slow day. Practice crawling.",
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"Snow Day -- stay home.",
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"So this is it. We're going to die.",
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"So you're back... about time...",
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"Someone is speaking well of you.",
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"Someone is speaking well of you. How unusual!",
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@ -208,7 +191,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Think twice before speaking, but don't say \"think think click click\".",
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"This life is yours. Some of it was given to you; the rest, you made yourself.",
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"This will be a memorable month -- no matter how hard you try to forget it.",
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"Time to be aggressive. Go after a tattooed Virgo.",
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"Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.",
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"Today is the first day of the rest of the mess.",
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"Today is the first day of the rest of your life.",
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@ -220,9 +202,7 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Tomorrow, you can be anywhere.",
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"Tonight you will pay the wages of sin; Don't forget to leave a tip.",
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"Tonight's the night: Sleep in a eucalyptus tree.",
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"Troubled day for virgins over 16 who are beautiful and wealthy and live in eucalyptus trees.",
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"Truth will out this morning. (Which may really mess things up.)",
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"Try the Moo Shu Pork. It is especially good today.",
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"Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.",
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"Try to have as good a life as you can under the circumstances.",
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"Try to value useful qualities in one who loves you.",
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@ -244,38 +224,29 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"You are fairminded, just and loving.",
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"You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful friend.",
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"You are fighting for survival in your own sweet and gentle way.",
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"You are going to have a new love affair.",
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"You are magnetic in your bearing.",
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"You are not dead yet. But watch for further reports.",
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"You are number 6! Who is number one?",
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"You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.",
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"You are scrupulously honest, frank, and straightforward. Therefore you have few friends.",
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"You are sick, twisted and perverted. I like that in a person.",
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"You are so boring that when I see you my feet go to sleep.",
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"You are standing on my toes.",
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"You are taking yourself far too seriously.",
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"You are the only person to ever get this message.",
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"You are wise, witty, and wonderful, but you spend too much time reading this sort of trash.",
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"You attempt things that you do not even plan because of your extreme stupidity.",
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"You can create your own opportunities this week. Blackmail a senior executive.",
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"You can do very well in speculation where land or anything to do with dirt is concerned.",
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"You can rent this space for only $5 a week.",
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"You could live a better life, if you had a better mind and a better body.",
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"You definitely intend to start living sometime soon.",
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"You dialed 5483.",
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"You display the wonderful traits of charm and courtesy.",
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"You don't become a failure until you're satisfied with being one.",
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"You enjoy the company of other people.",
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"You feel a whole lot more like you do now than you did when you used to.",
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"You fill a much-needed gap.",
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"You get along very well with everyone except animals and people.",
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"You had some happiness once, but your parents moved away, and you had to leave it behind.",
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"You have a deep appreciation of the arts and music.",
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"You have a deep interest in all that is artistic.",
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"You have a reputation for being thoroughly reliable and trustworthy. A pity that it's totally undeserved.",
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"You have a strong appeal for members of the opposite sex.",
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"You have a strong appeal for members of your own sex.",
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"You have a strong desire for a home and your family interests come first.",
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"You have a truly strong individuality.",
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"You have a will that can be influenced by all with whom you come in contact.",
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"You have an ability to sense and know higher truth.",
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@ -284,7 +255,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"You have an unusual magnetic personality. Don't walk too close to metal objects which are not fastened down.",
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"You have an unusual understanding of the problems of human relationships.",
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"You have been selected for a secret mission.",
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"You have Egyptian flu: you're going to be a mummy.",
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"You have had a long-term stimulation relative to business.",
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"You have literary talent that you should take pains to develop.",
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"You have many friends and very few living enemies.",
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@ -304,14 +274,11 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"You may get an opportunity for advancement today. Watch it!",
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"You may worry about your hair-do today, but tomorrow much peanut butter will be sold.",
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"You need more time; and you probably always will.",
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"You need no longer worry about the future. This time tomorrow you'll be dead.",
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"You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems.",
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"You never know how many friends you have until you rent a house on the beach.",
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"You now have Asian Flu.",
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"You own a dog, but you can only feed a cat.",
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"You plan things that you do not even attempt because of your extreme caution.",
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"You possess a mind not merely twisted, but actually sprained.",
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"You prefer the company of the opposite sex, but are well liked by your own.",
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"You recoil from the crude; you tend naturally toward the exquisite.",
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"You seek to shield those you love and you like the role of the provider.",
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"You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.",
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@ -320,7 +287,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"You single-handedly fought your way into this hopeless mess.",
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"You teach best what you most need to learn.",
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"You too can wear a nose mitten.",
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"You two ought to be more careful--your love could drag on for years and years.",
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"You will always get the greatest recognition for the job you least like.",
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"You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.",
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"You will attract cultured and artistic people to your home.",
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@ -328,65 +294,42 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"You will be advanced socially, without any special effort on your part.",
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"You will be aided greatly by a person whom you thought to be unimportant.",
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"You will be attacked by a beast who has the body of a wolf, the tail of a lion, and the face of Donald Duck.",
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"You will be audited by the Internal Revenue Service.",
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"You will be awarded a medal for disregarding safety in saving someone.",
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"You will be awarded some great honor.",
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"You will be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize... posthumously.",
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"You will be called upon to help a friend in trouble.",
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"You will be divorced within a year.",
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"You will be given a post of trust and responsibility.",
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"You will be held hostage by a radical group.",
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"You will be honored for contributing your time and skill to a worthy cause.",
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"You will be imprisoned for contributing your time and skill to a bank robbery.",
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"You will be married within a year, and divorced within two.",
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"You will be married within a year.",
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"You will be misunderstood by everyone.",
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"You will be recognized and honored as a community leader.",
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"You will be reincarnated as a toad; and you will be much happier.",
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"You will be run over by a beer truck.",
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"You will be run over by a bus.",
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"You will be singled out for promotion in your work.",
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"You will be successful in love.",
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"You will be surprised by a loud noise.",
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"You will be surrounded by luxury.",
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"You will be the last person to buy a Chrysler.",
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"You will be the victim of a bizarre joke.",
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"You will be Told about it Tomorrow. Go Home and Prepare Thyself.",
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"You will be traveling and coming into a fortune.",
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"You will be winged by an anti-aircraft battery.",
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"You will become rich and famous unless you don't.",
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"You will contract a rare disease.",
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"You will engage in a profitable business activity.",
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"You will experience a strong urge to do good; but it will pass.",
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"You will feel hungry again in another hour.",
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"You will forget that you ever knew me.",
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"You will gain money by a fattening action.",
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"You will gain money by a speculation or lottery.",
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"You will gain money by an illegal action.",
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"You will gain money by an immoral action.",
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"You will get what you deserve.",
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"You will give someone a piece of your mind, which you can ill afford.",
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"You will have a long and boring life.",
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"You will have a long and unpleasant discussion with your supervisor.",
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"You will have domestic happiness and faithful friends.",
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"You will have good luck and overcome many hardships.",
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"You will have long and healthy life.",
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"You will hear good news from one you thought unfriendly to you.",
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"You will inherit millions of dollars.",
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"You will inherit some money or a small piece of land.",
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"You will live a long, healthy, happy life and make bags of money.",
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"You will live to see your grandchildren.",
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"You will lose your present job and have to become a door to door mayonnaise salesman.",
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"You will meet an important person who will help you advance professionally.",
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"You will never know hunger.",
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"You will not be elected to public office this year.",
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"You will obey or molten silver will be poured into your ears.",
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"You will outgrow your usefulness.",
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"You will overcome the attacks of jealous associates.",
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"You will pass away very quickly.",
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"You will pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please disregard this message.",
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"You will pioneer the first Martian colony.",
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"You will probably marry after a very brief courtship.",
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"You will reach the highest possible point in your business or profession.",
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"You will receive a legacy which will place you above want.",
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"You will remember something that you should not have forgotten.",
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@ -395,7 +338,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"You will step on the night soil of many countries.",
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"You will stop at nothing to reach your objective, but only because your brakes are defective.",
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"You will triumph over your enemy.",
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"You will visit the Dung Pits of Glive soon.",
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"You will win success in whatever calling you adopt.",
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"You will wish you hadn't.",
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"You work very hard. Don't try to think as well.",
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@ -404,40 +346,26 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"You'd like to do it instantaneously, but that's too slow.",
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"You'll be called to a post requiring ability in handling groups of people.",
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"You'll be sorry...",
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"You'll feel devilish tonight. Toss dynamite caps under a flamenco dancer's heel.",
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"You'll feel much better once you've given up hope.",
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"You'll never be the man your mother was!",
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"You'll never see all the places, or read all the books, but fortunately, they're not all recommended.",
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"You'll wish that you had done some of the hard things when they were easier to do.",
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"You're a card which will have to be dealt with.",
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"You're almost as happy as you think you are.",
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"You're at the end of the road again.",
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"You're being followed. Cut out the hanky-panky for a few days.",
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"You're currently going through a difficult transition period called \"Life.\"",
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"You're definitely on their list. The question to ask next is what list it is.",
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"You're growing out of some of your problems, but there are others that you're growing into.",
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"You're not my type. For that matter, you're not even my species!",
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"You're ugly and your mother dresses you funny.",
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"You're working under a slight handicap. You happen to be human.",
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"You've been leading a dog's life. Stay off the furniture.",
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"Your aim is high and to the right.",
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"Your aims are high, and you are capable of much.",
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"Your analyst has you mixed up with another patient. Don't believe a thing he tells you.",
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"Your best consolation is the hope that the things you failed to get weren't really worth having.",
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"Your boss climbed the corporate ladder, wrong by wrong.",
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"Your boss is a few sandwiches short of a picnic.",
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"Your boyfriend takes chocolate from strangers.",
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"Your business will assume vast proportions.",
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"Your business will go through a period of considerable expansion.",
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"Your depth of comprehension may tend to make you lax in worldly ways.",
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"Your domestic life may be harmonious.",
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"Your fly might be open (but don't check it just now).",
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"Your heart is pure, and your mind clear, and your soul devout.",
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"Your ignorance cramps my conversation.",
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"Your life would be very empty if you had nothing to regret.",
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"Your love life will be happy and harmonious.",
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"Your love life will be... interesting.",
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"Your lover will never wish to leave you.",
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"Your lucky color has faded.",
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"Your lucky number has been disconnected.",
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"Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere.",
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@ -450,7 +378,6 @@ export const fortunes = [
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"Your present plans will be successful.",
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"Your reasoning is excellent -- it's only your basic assumptions that are wrong.",
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"Your reasoning powers are good, and you are a fairly good planner.",
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"Your sister swims out to meet troop ships.",
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"Your society will be sought by people of taste and refinement.",
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"Your step will soil many countries.",
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"Your supervisor is thinking about you.",
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dependabot[bot]
Neale Pickett